I've actually never looked at her just to see what she looked like in her underwear. I know I said I did but I was runnin outa things to type. She dressed out next to me today cuz we had gym today, and I sware to the first gay person of the world that I didn't look. When we do talk I look her in the eye, just like I do everybody else. I feel bad though...my gf read this and now she's depressed and mad at me even though she promised not to read it again.

I feel horrible though, I told Chloe that I liked Jazzy cuz I always thought she would be happier if I told her the truth than if she later found out that I was lying, even if the truth hurt. Maybe it would have been better just to keep my goddamn mouth shut.

Today Mom took me to tasty taco's and ya know in my city you don't see many gay ppl here, but these two guys were like totally out. Especially the emo dude cuz he just walked right up to the guys ass and totally GROPED! He didn't tap he groped, and even though it was akward for me I was happy cuz they weren't ashamed of who they were, which makes me feel bad cuz I don't have anyone to be out with. Dammit.

Last week I promised Chloe that I would stay home tonight cuz it's movie night but she just wanted us to have a night alone. Of course I have bad luck though so instead of it just being going to Paul Revere's we are going to a movie tonight, and my Mom is making me go cuz I don't spend time with Dady anymore. I'm spending the night at Dad's tonight and coming home tomorrow. On the plus side of all of this though I get to pick the movie......ok nevermind, it didn't help any.

I went to go see the phyciatrist today for my first appointment and I thought it was gonna be a girl. Don't you think that if your doctors last name was Nightingale that they would prolly be a girl? I know thats stereotypical but yeah. My parents got the times wrong so I was there for two hours. On the bright yet dim side, there was this really, really, really adorable baby in the waiting room. She was just all sleepy and stuff, she completely zonked out every minute of so. But then the four year old at the coloring table would scream and then she would cry and then the older kids would turn their headphones on to drown out the noise. I miss Chloe right now, I now she's mad and her minutes ain't free but I want to talk to her so bad. Okay now I've gotta go, ciao!