How to bring your boy up straight
Friends of my parents had a baby. It's a boy. When the mom was carrying him and holding him in front of her chest, he grabbed her breast. His dad, a very charming and sociable person, - everybody loves him and wants to be his friend - had to do some straight bonding by making a joke about that. In his amiable and disarming way, he laughed and said: "Haha, he is already very good at that!" Yes, his little 5-months-old son will later be a heterosexual casanova, of course! What other thought could have entered the proud dad's mind?
And everybody seemed to be pleased by the joke, fostering affectionate feelings for the young parents and their cute baby son. Their cute straight baby son, I should probably say.
I wish I had made a comment. A slightly cynical comment which would have made them realize that they should not assume that their boy will be straight. "O, so you're bringing your boy up straight?" Something like that.
I want to find a group with whom to distribute flyers to parents of little babies.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE!
Don't assume your cute litte thing will be straight!
Wait until they tell you whether or not they are!
DANGER!
Failure to comply with these instructions can cause enourmous human suffering!
This flyer ought to be in every glossy magazine and advisory book for prospective and actual parents. It ought to be in the information material of every adoption agency and on every delivering mom's bedside table!
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Comments
Haha. This is funny. You know
Haha. This is funny. You know why?
My little sister used to like boobs too, (For a while actually.) so my parents joked about her being a lesbian. (She wanted to breastfeed for a while and my mom would say things like "wait till you get a girlfriend!" XD) But I'm the lesbian one. My dad actually told me when I came out to him that he thought my sis would end up lesbian. Probably because Sis is shuch a tomboy. (As well as what I mentioned above.) We still don't know if she is or isn't. She's like, 8. But I don't think it's likely. But then again, you never know.
:-)
You two (oldfoxbob, nayru) are sweet :-)
How nice you're gonna have a sun, oldfoxbob!! Good for him that you don't expect him to be anything. (hihi but let's hope he's gay or bi... of course without putting any pressure on him ;-)
@nayru: Your parents are sweet too :-) and that's funny what you wrote. My sister is (used to be) the tomboy too, in our family. But I'm the lesbian one. (My sister's 19, and she seems straight, judging from her having boyfriends...)
We have all been injured, profoundly. (Donna Haraway)
Well, you can't tell with an
Well, you can't tell with an 8 year old. She's had some male 'crushes' before but I had a 'boyfriend' when I was like, 5. (My first, and probably last.) So that dosen't mean much.
You see, in my mind, all people are asexual until proven otherwise. Especialy with kids. I don't like to assume anything because I tend to be wrong. XD (Well, that's exactly it. Mabye asexual is the wrong word. But I think you get what I mean.)
And plus, it annoys me when people assume stuff about me. Because I happen to be in a lot of minorites and so they're usually wrong. XD I've grown used to it though. (It happens a lot.) And so, I tend to avoid assuming things about other people.
Ahhh
Don't We wish that there was such a flyer for parents.
I am getting a boy baby in December and He will be what ever he wants to be...I will be broken harted if he is not bi or gay but then I am not a bigot like some parents are.
oldfoxbob
Genius is not a sign of intelligence, but rather
that of common sense.
sorry, maybe i'm just an igno
sorry, maybe i'm just an ignorant dumbass, but maybe he was just making a joke? to be honest, i would've probably made the same joke and i'm as gay as the day is long. it's impossible to be constantly aware...
try not to jump on people so much for making alleged assumptions...
"Yes! No! Oh, damn!"
he was certainly making a jok
he was certainly making a joke, but to me the joke seemed full of the "Everyone in this world is of course straight (without any need to mention it)" attitude.
When he made the joke it was as if he blotted out the fact that there are lesbians and gays. and I think the fact that many parents always imagine their child straight (from birth throughout all childhood and adolescent phases, until - in some cases - their son or daughter comes out), makes coming out to parents often so difficult. (My mom made me feel like a traitor.)
It's impossible to be constantly aware that not all people are straight?? (Cause that's the awareness that was missing.) I don't think this is impossible. it's really not such a difficult "awareness" - it should be a basic fact of life. Don't be so modest in what you dare to aspire.
We have all been injured, profoundly. (Donna Haraway)
its so true. (I'm female, of
its so true. (I'm female, of course) and people who barely know me want to know if i have a boyfriend. because of course I must be straight. Everyone just assumes. :(
the kid was probably just hun
the kid was probably just hungry...
"freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose"
I frigging hate how people as
I frigging hate how people assume that everyone around them is heterosexual, and that heterosexuality is "normal", and then they have the guts to tell us that we're acting wierd with our gay pride parades and dances. Stupid Fucks!! *Srry.*